Don't Eat the Tree

"You see, Sailor, this is a Christmas tree...you may remember we had one last December. We don't typically eat our trees. Yes, I know you ate it last year but this year I was hoping we could refrain from that type of midnight snacking. These sparkly objects are ornaments. I would really prefer if you refrained from eating them as well. I know they were oh-so-yummy last Christmas and that a puppy tummy can, in fact, digest an assortment of ornaments but just the same, I would prefer if you left them alone. If you cannot control yourself then I can move all the ornaments to the top half of the tree again but I really would prefer to have a much more balanced look this year. Thanks, Sailor. Your ability to comprehend the English language is amazing."